


Retro

by PoetsReach



Series: Emergency Goalie [6]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Cannon Typical Violence, Gen, Injury, Steve Dangle Podcast, Trans Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2018-03-08
Packaged: 2019-03-28 21:56:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13912971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoetsReach/pseuds/PoetsReach
Summary: AAAND LEAFS WIN! In a RIDICULOUS 9:7 game.— Cut to Hat Guy —Oh my God It was like the 80’s were back to haunt us. You know, I’m not sure I like this more scoring thing after all!





	1. LFR- The 80’s - TOR 9 - TB 7

— Intro ends —

AAAND LEAFS WIN! In a RIDICULOUS 9:7 game. 

— Cut to Hat Guy —

Oh my God It was like the 80’s were back to haunt us. You know, I’m not sure I like this more scoring thing after all!

— Cuts back to Steve —

Okay, a lot happened in this game so first a short summary. First period, Leafs are starting their backup goalie, nothing to be worried about, he’s been having a good season right? WRONG. Tampa scores THREE TIMES on their FIRST FOUR SHOTS. And it’s 3-0, an embarrassing, but normal final score in this decade. Babcock pulls Wall and in goes Roth to try and clean up the mess.

From that point on the game got EVEN MORE ridiculous! I actually counted and you know how many minutes were spent playing with no one in the box? SEVEN MINUTES! OUT OF SIXTY! Neither team could stay out of the damn penalty box! It was incredible! And the refs were being reasonable, they were the only normal part of this game! Leafs score the next four. Marner, Kapanen, Matthews, Matthews again this time assisted by Marner, remember that for later. And the Leafs are, Miraculously, in the lead 4-3 and back in this game only five minutes into the second period. 

Oh yeah, Roth got an assist on Marner’s goal to. 

At this point there have been two, eh, miner fights. 

Next eight goals scored the teams go back and forth and we are at 8-7 Leafs. There have also been two more fight the second of which was a line brawl. So that was fun. Marner got his Gordie Howe Hat Trick. I prefer the other kind of Hat Trick which OH Look at That! Matthews scores a filthy one and we’ve go one of those TO!

Thirty seconds later There is a nasty hit on Leafs rookie Frk who just got called up and who’s name has no vowels and which I have almost assuredly mispronounced in a way that was as TERRIBLE AS THAT HIT! Player safety should really be looking at that one.

Now. That would have started a fight in a NORMAL game. Since this game was INSANE it was a bench clearing brawl. I had never seen that in person. Did I mention I was at this particular game? Because I was.

When I say bench clearing I Mean EVERYONE. Goalies included.

Any one who has been blind enough to call Roth delicate? They need to sit the fuck down and eat their words. That Man Is built like a brick wall and has a Nasty right hook. Roth was actually the first to the scene of the crime. The Hit was right in the corner to his left and he Booked It over there and went right after Johnson. 

By the time all of that was sorted out the benches were half empty, the boxes were full and, somehow, Roth was still in net.

Last two minutes of the game Lightning pull their goalie and with ten seconds left they ice it. Or they would have only Roth comes out to play it and sends it all the way down the rink and into the empty net for his first Ever goal, pre NHL stats included, AND the First Ever Goalie Gordie Howe Hat Trick in NHL History. 

Because Why Not?!

Because that’s just the kind of game this was.

— Smiles beatifically into the camera —

Isn’t hockey Fun?

— Jump cut —

Now, since SO much happened in this game and I don’t want this to be a 20 minute video I’m not going to talk about everything in detail, just the highlights…


	2. Locker Room Post Game

“Now Boys! I know we won but that game was Shit. You were not professionals, that was not Leafs Hockey. I will be dealing with you tomorrow at practice. 

Expect you Wally. You should have told me you had a migraine developing, but you weren’t even close to the idiocy of these buffoons. You’re fine, go home and sleep it off. Practice tomorrow is optional. 

Not for the rest of you!”

“Coach?”

“What is it Roth?”

“How’s Jakub?”

“He’s at the hospital. They think they might have to do surgery on the arm, they’re hoping the ribs will heal as is. So far no sign of concussion thank god, but his neck is going to hurt for a while.” He sighed. “I understand why you started that fight. I’m tempted to make practice optional for you to, since that was your only lapse in judgment, but you know what management said about you fighting. Don’t be shocked if they call you in over this.”

“Why would management want to talk to him? It was just a fight, right? I mean, yeah, it turned into a brawl, but for him it was just a fight.”

Naz rolled his eyes. “Take three guesses Mouse, two of them don’t count.”

“Because he’s the starting goalie?”

“Marner, I’m flattered.”

*Sigh* “No Mouse. Think. You remember that nickname Media made us stop using incase the press found out?”

“Token? But what— Oh. Well that shouldn’t matter!”

“I appreciate your indignation on my behalf Mouse. Your right it shouldn't.” He held up his phone. “And according to my agent, who has read my new contract very carefully, it doesn’t any more. At least not legally.“

———————————-

“Hey kid, how you doing?”

“They gave me drugs, so I’m not feeling much of anything right now. Gonna be in a lot of pain soon though… Did you tell Avi that I don't like I don’t like people on top of me?”

“... No. I didn’t, why?”

“It’s just, something he said to the guy who hit me when he was dragging him off, something about getting the fuck off of me.”

“Well, Johnson was kind of sitting on you, holding you down. And Avi is observant. He probably saw what happened in practice. You want me to talk to him about it?”

“No. I’ll talk to him. They say that I can go back to Toronto next week if everything looks good.” *sigh* “I’m probably out for the rest of the season.”

“Yeah, I figured.”

“Should I go home? I mean. If I’m not going to be able to play?”

“Only if you want to. You have a place with my family whether your playing or not and the girls are looking forward to taking care of you. Now I can’t guarantee how long that is going to last, they are five years old and the attention span is sort of limited at this point.” 

*Yawn* “Tell them I miss them?”

“Of course, now you need to get some sleep so you can heal up. We’ll talk more tomorrow, okay?”


End file.
